just an afterthought

I think I've been imagining all this.
I think I'm feeling something weird inside my chest but I don't know why. It's like reaching for that cookie jar while you know that your hand is gonna be trapped shut inside it if you ever try to reach for the cookie.
Yet you try anyway.
And out of fear that you might get stuck or injured, you let your hand dangle. In-between reaching the cookies, already touching the tips of the chocolate-filled crust but unwilling to grab it in case the lid shuts.
And all around you people are laughing behind your back. "Nice try," they'd say. Or "Only morons would do something that they know is filled with risks."
But sometimes, you get your hand out of that jar. Because in a dangling position, your hand gets tired after all. Sometimes, you're distracted by all the pretty things in the cabinet. The lollipops, the cotton candy, chocolate caramel bars, Krispie Treats, gumballs, colorful, delicious, seductive. But no matter what, eventually, you end up glancing at the jar. Wondering what it it would be like to take a bite.
Because from what I hear, chocolate chip cookies give you the best comfort and warmth.
Even the most average one. Even the misshaped ones. But if you want to take a bite, then you have to insert your hand wholly inside the jar. Feel the lid shut down on you, causing you to cry in pain. Cursing at yourself for being such an idiot. You knew this was going to happen. Yet you did it anyway.
I guess this is what makes a human being; a mix of bravery and stupidity.